“The time to relax is when you don't have time for
it” says Sydney Harris. ‘Ju’ in Japanese Judo means gentle. A Judo practitioner
is advised to completely relax his body and mind at the point of contact with
the opponent and use opponent’s force to topple him. Resistance causes energy
loss. You are less efficient in facing your opponent with depleted energy. Resistance
also causes stress. You are more likely to lose the fight. However, learning to
relax in such a situation is not easy. But once you have mastered the art of
relaxing, you start enjoying the fight and least likely to lose. In other
competitive sports too, the first thing a player learns is the technique of
falling safely. Again, the essence is to offer no resistance while falling.
In life also, we are constantly faced with
problems and issues appearing as opponents / enemies. Our normal reaction is to
deny what has appeared by asking ‘why me’ or ‘why now’? We start resisting the
problem. We don’t realise that such questioning or resisting will not make that
problem disappear. In fact, by asking such questions, we provide more power to
the problem. This denial causes stress, anxiety, depression, anger, or fear. We
become more vulnerable. We are not at our best in such a situation.
We can use the technique of relaxation to face any
challenge in life most effectively. Everything in the nature happens easily and
gently. Flowers bloom gently, seasons change slowly, and a child grows in no
hurry. ‘To be at ease’ is our original nature. When we deviate from this
‘ease’, we become ‘diseased’. We are at our best when we are at ease. When mind
is at ease and body is relaxed, we can see many more options to deal with the
challenge at hand. We develop clarity to choose the best response
required in that situation. Indeed, only the best response spontaneously
comes out of this state of being.
Any stress is first registered in the mind. If it
is allowed to stay even for a short while, it will start impacting the body
making it weaker. We can use the first sign of any mental stress or anxiety or
even a slight irritation as the leading indicator of oncoming challenge. We
need to be alert at all times to notice this. This alertness will also help in
reminding us to immediately accept what has appeared before us without
unnecessary questioning.
As soon as we notice any irritation, we need to
stop doing whatever we are doing at that moment, including any form of
thinking. This pause will keep us in the present moment and stop from reacting
impulsively. This pause will also open door for seeing available options for
proper response. During this pause, we should switch to deep breathing with
full attention on the breath. This will further calm the mind and provide
clarity to select the best option for responding to the challenge at hand.
Many minor issues would simply drop in such a
state of alert relaxation, while proper response would effortlessly emerge for
the other major issues. So many things
that regularly cause frequent irritations to us would start disappearing from
our life. With constant practice over time, we will start enjoying every
challenge coming our way, just as a sportsman enjoys every move made by his
opponent. Life will become a game where every challenge provides opportunity to
grow and enjoy.
